REVIEW: Alpha Prime PrimeBites Protein Brownies

Flavors Tried: Chocolate Fudge & Chocolate Cookie Monster

Price: $39.99 for 12 ($3.33 per brownie)

Nutrition: 185 Calories, 7g Fat, 22g Carbs (2g Fiber, 6g Sugar, 11g Sugar Alcohol), 17g Protein

Primtebites protein brownie

When I saw this protein brownie at my local Vitamin Shoppe, I bought it with extremely low expectations.

Truth be told, I had never heard of AP Sports (the makers of these protein brownies) and that is always a red flag for me. Since I’m pretty plugged into the protein snack game, I’m always hesitant when I come across a brand I’ve never heard of (unless they are brand new, of course).

Still, I went into this review with a completely open mind.

Much like protein cookies, I rarely find a protein brownie or cake that I thoroughly enjoy. Most of them tend to be extremely dry, and I was hoping that would not be the case here.

Especially considering the fact that this brownie cost over $3.

Primebites Nutrition

Nutritionally, I was happy to see that this is a pretty well-rounded brownie. I don’t get super excited when I see a snack with a ton of fiber and 0g sugar, because that typically leads to mediocre flavor.

This brownie is 185 calories and contains 17g of protein, which is pretty solid, but 5 grams of that protein comes from collagen.

That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but if we’re looking at complete protein (which is far superior for building muscle over an incomplete protein like collagen), then we’re only getting 12 grams of protein here.

Also, it’s worth pointing out that these brownies contain 11 grams of sugar alcohol. For me, that’s not a deal-breaker because my stomach can handle sugar alcohol, but I know that it causes discomfort for a lot of people out there.

Chocolate Fudge Review

Holding primebites brownie

For under 200 calories, I’m pretty impressed by the size of this brownie. While not huge, it’s a nice thick brownie, and you can tell by looking at it that it’s not super dry.

The brownie almost looks like it has a bottom layer of chewy & dense brownie, and a top layer that is a bit cakier.

Prime Bites Protein Brownie

Biting into this brownie, I was extremely impressed.

I love a dense and chewy brownie, and unfortunately, this is much cakier than I prefer my brownies. Still, it’s very moist and has a chew to it, so it ends up being a happy marriage of a chewy brownie and chocolate cake.

If you prefer your brownies to be cakey (which I know a lot of people do) then you’d absolutely love these.

In terms of flavor, this protein brownie tastes like a rich chocolate cake, which is exactly what you’d hope for. You don’t taste the sugar alcohol at all, and there is no bitter aftertaste like a lot of chocolate-flavored protein bars tend to have.

For me, I’d prefer this brownie if it was denser and chewier, but that’s truly my only “issue” with this brownie. Even though it’s cakey, it’s still very rich, so I can’t complain much.

Chocolate Cookie Monster Review

Chocolate Cookie Monster Protein Brownie

After I tried the fudge brownie, I immediately went to my local GNC to find a new flavor to try to see how it would compare. I was only able to find one, but it turned out to be a great one.

Chocolate Cookie Monster is essentially just a cookies & cream flavor, but I had no idea what that meant for a brownie.

I was expecting a bit more chunks in the brownie, but there were still very clearly chocolate cookie pieces throughout the bar.

As far as protein brownies go, this is easily one of the best I’ve had. I can’t vouch for the other flavors, but this chocolate brownie is the real deal. Flavor-wise, you definitely taste the black cocoa that makes Oreo cookies so iconic.

Essentially, it tastes like a really rich dark chocolate. If you’ve ever had black cocoa or Dutch-processed cocoa, you’ll know the flavor.

You don’t really get any cream flavor, but considering this flavor isn’t literally “cookies and cream” I can’t fault them for that.

In terms of texture, this brownie was unreal. When I tried the basic flavor, I felt like the brownie was a bit too much on the cakey side, but this flavor was exactly what I want in a brownie: dense & fudgy.

I suppose I’m going to need to update this review with one more flavor in the future to see if it leans more heavily towards cakey or fudgy, but as far as the chocolate cookie monster flavor is concerned, it’s a perfectly fudgy brownie.

Blueberry Cobbler Blondie Review

I’m a very curious person, and I always want to deliver the most honest and accurate reviews possible, so I ran back out once again to grab a couple more flavors of the Prime Bites protein brownies.

This time, I was able to grab blondies. I was riding a real high from the previous brownies I tried, but this blondie really brought my back down to Earth hard.

When I saw blueberry cobbler, I was expecting something that would resemble a blueberry muffin in some way. But man, this one completely misses the mark.

The blueberry taste is very subtle, and it comes through in the aftertaste more than anything else.

There’s a very strong bitterness to it that I also experienced in the MRE Brownies. The bitter aftertaste made me regrettably not even finish this one, which is never a fun thing when you spend $3.

This flavor is still soft, but it’s not nearly as moist as the other brownies I tried. If I had to compare it to anything, I’d say it’s closer to cornbread than it is to a blondie.

Between the lackluster blueberry flavor, the lack of blueberries mixed in, the subpar texture, and the extremely bitter aftertaste, this one is a huge pass for me.

Birthday Cake Blondie Review

After the blueberry cobbler blondie, my expectations for the birthday cake blondie could not be lower.

Luckily, it’s a small step up from the blueberry cobbler, but it’s still far from what I experienced with the two brownies I tried.

The birthday cake flavor is decent, but this blondie also has that bitter aftertaste that is quite unpleasant to me. I suppose chocolate flavor masks it, because I didn’t notice that with the protein brownies I tasted.

This blondie is a little more dense & dry than I would like, and it actually reminds me a lot of the Eat Me Guilt Free blondies. In fact, it looks nearly identical…

Eat me Guilt Free birthday cake

There is a noticeable citrus flavor to this blondie, it eats more like a pound cake than a birthday cake. Yes, there are sprinkles in it, but there is really nothing about the flavor that screams “birthday cake” to me.

All in all, it’s a pretty average blondie, and I wouldn’t be running out to try it again.

Overall Thoughts: Alpha Prime Brownies

Alpha Prime Bites Protein Brownie

Man oh man, this is the tale of two products: brownies and blondies.

The brownies are, without a doubt, one of the best protein brownies I’ve tried.

Most protein baked goods are extremely dry, but Alpha Prime is flipping the script with these brownies, and they are absolutely delicious.

But then we have the blondies…and I just can’t recommend them. They both contain a very strong bitter aftertaste that doesn’t sit well with me, and they are far inferior to the brownies.

In my initial review, I only tried the brownies and gave them a very high rating, but I needed to update my review to reflect the blondies as well.

I wish I could separate them into 2 different reviews because they are truly so different, but they’re technically the same product, which is wild to me.

If you see the brownies at a store near you, especially if they are on sale, I highly recommend scooping them up to try. But even if you find them at full price, I’d say they are still definitely worth the try.

If the blondies are the only flavors available, then I’d definitely pass on them.

Alpha Prime Bites Protein Brownie
REVIEW: Alpha Prime PrimeBites Protein Brownies
These protein brownies are some of the best I've ever had, but the blondies are a huge disappointment. I highly recommend trying any of the chocolate flavors if you come across them, but I cannot recommend the blondies.
Flavor Accuracy
Overall Taste
The Good
Impressive size
Rich chocolate flavor in the brownies
Soft & moist
The Bad
High in sugar alcohols (can cause GI discomfort for some people)
5g protein from collagen, meaning only 12 grams are complete protein
Strong bitter aftertaste in the blondies
Give 'Em A Try
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